After 28 years

Saturday morning. It started like every normal Saturday morning usually starts. We had our end-sem lab quiz scheduled that day, it sounds important but could it be more important than the event that was scheduled for that day! Well the answer might be subjective but it is unquestionable at the same time. So, just like each lab class we ‘calmly’ went inside and almost all of us were trying to have premonitions, not about the quiz questions of course!!So, the lab ended at 12:30 for the 1st batch (I was in it) quiz takers and at 1:00 for the 2nd batch. And after the lab, we didn't have any classes, not by time table. It was because the day was more of a festival for the citizens of a country where cricket is an unequivocal religion. So, we all fastened our seat belts and got ready for the war to begin. I was getting flashbacks, or rather, flashes of the Ramayana.

The match began. Many boarders were enjoying the match in the dining hall of our hostel and it felt like a stadium but, I preferred watching it online. Whatever! The match went on and on and on. India’s innings started and started rather at a low note. Sachin’s wicket came as a heart choking situation and many were disheartened. Well, the match was full of nail biting moments. Sachin and Gambhir’s wickets were like ‘Nooooo…..that can’t be…..!’ moments. I started disliking the bowler. Anyways, I was watching the match alone in my room, so it was a bit of pressure to witness some worrisome situations. The last 6 overs to go! It was expected that Malinga was going to bowl the 48th and 50th overs-the 2 crucial overs for India. I was feeling that it was kind of a live or die moment. At last, at the end of 47th over, I thought, I can’t handle the pressure alone and went to a friend’s room (who was also witnessing the match online) for the last 3 overs. And, as expected Malinga bowled the 48th over but…..tchtchtch….what great strokes! My heart elated with each stroke. That was just wonderful, awesome! Starting of 49th over…..5 runs,12 balls and a great performance awaited. We were praying for a six but the first ball contributed for a single run. Next, 11 balls, 4 runs…..Dhoni on strike. The ball was bowled, Dhoni hit the ball…..and buffering stopped. We were sure that it must be a six or at least a four but for 5 seconds could not judge what it was exactly! I patted the laptop heavily as if it would listen to me and would show the consequence. That was funny but at that moment it was not! Finally, after 5 seconds we saw that it was a huge six and……..INDIA WON THE WORLD CUP 2011! I was spellbound. I did not know for a minute how am I supposed to react. I was just left in that moment. I did not want to come out of that. I was seeing my friends screaming and dancing with joy and I was just asking them,”Is it for real? ” Then, we saw Yuvraj and Harbhajan crying and then I realized, 'Yes. We actually have the cup now. We are the champions now!' A lot of thoughts and lots of feelings were streaming in but I was just confused what to do. Should I scream, should I laugh or should I cry. Anyways, we enjoyed the last moments of the world cup in the dining hall. Sachin being carried on the shoulders and India’s victory walk round the stadium was heart-elating. Sachin’s last ODI world cup in his hometown, in his ground with a victory, world cup victory, and his cherished dream of holding a world cup in his 21 years of carrier, that was one of the most glorious moments. But that was also sad. I was feeling as if this is the last world cup match for me. Anyway, we are the champions now and that’s the best thing. When the team was posing for a photo with the World Cup in their hands and a banner reading ‘Champions’ in front of them, I bet most Indians would have witnessed a ‘goose bumps moment’. Oh, that is just so good, it’s hard to come out of it.

All this glory, all this pomp is worth the win, a win after 28 years. But, what disturbs me is the amount of money. Yes. Many organizations-govt. and private have already announced and some are yet to announce huge prize money for the team members for their win. I agree that they are worth it and deserving. But, just think, gifting each player 1-2 crore rupees on one side and people of the same nation dying of hunger, committing suicides out of hunger on the other, where does this issue fit in? If one crore rupees have truly been invested for such a cause, how many lives could have been saved? How many people could have been benefited?

Think of 2007 world cup. We, residents of a civilized nation turned into terrorists when Indian team failed miserably. We were in the verge of demolishing their houses; we burned down their dummies and what not. Let us forget the past. It was bitter. But shouldn’t we give it a thought? We are healthy minded people and have got the capacity to think and ponder over an issue. We are happy now as our team won the world cup. They are happy too. It’s our win, our country’s win. But, when the team lost in 2007, was it only their loss?! Were they feeling happy about it? We were feeling bad; but, at the same time we should have thought, what they were feeling at that moment. They were also depressed and we added on to it by burning down their dummies, by attacking their homes and by bad mouthing them. Is this what independence should look like? Definitely not. Now, we are raining gold on them. If a small, just a trifle amount could have been used otherwise, a lot of deaths could possibly have been done away with.

Anyways, it was Team India! The men in blue! And, tomorrow is Blue Day. Just hope, the glory remains with us forever.

Copyright © One Life To Live. All Rights Reserved.

Tamishra

Copyright © One Life To Live. All Rights Reserved.

Marichikaa ra swapna

[This is a short story written in Oriya.
To read it ,click on the images given below]

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Reflection

Another morning heralds
And the sun sprangs out of the horizon
The darkness is nowhere to be seen
It lies there all within….

Hope fairy knocks the door
Wakes me up …
And drags me to the open moor
It lets me feel the breeze
As morning unfolds it crease

I see it has still followed me
“What do you want?”….
I wanted to ask… But
I saw it leap and sprang
With all joy and halcyon…
Can it feel….the mood I am in?
No,No…it can’t be….

The voices faded and it has to stop
I returned and went for the call
Day and night it seemed to me….
Long enough….and gloomy
Yet…it was not the way I thought
The sun just sensed it
And concealed it fiery wings

Perhaps just to hark me back
I walked past the moor
To the cosy filled door
As I turned back
I again saw it following
But this time it didn’t ‘sprang with joy’
It just stayed calm and …..
(I think it grieved)
But why is it so?
I didn’t know what to do
And what to say
But I remembered all the way
It danced with joy
Sometimes I marked it and
Sometimes I did ignore
But all the time it stayed with me
And reflected all that I seek
But how…how could it know everything?
I need to know
I have to enquire…
And then I called it upon
And asked,” Who you are?”
It stayed calm and looked at me
“Before I answer just close your eyes”
It spoke to me…..
“And said can you feel me all through the day”
“Yes, everytime”, I answered
It smiled and uttered,
“That am I….
You feel me every time,
Every time you are with yourself
Every time you are alone
Only I stay with you
And It’s only me who can reflect you….
Whatever you can call me
But the world names me truly as
A Shadow……".

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YOU ARE A BLUE PEARL

Head understands head and heart understands heart. The nose can only smell; eyes can only see; ears can only hear. Similarly, the heart can only feel while the head can only think. We try to put the heart in the head and the head in the heart and it doesn’t seem to work.

Your heart feels something is beautiful, and can feel it. When head says something is beautiful, we cling on to the word; it’s there in the mind, but we might not feel when the heart says the same thing. We repeat the word ‘beautiful’ in the head but it doesn’t seem or feel beautiful the way it would have if it had come from the heart.

Let’s talk about love. It’s the same thing-you talk too much about love, the word ‘love’ gets stuck in the head, but somehow there’s no depth of feeling. That’s because it’s in the head, not in the heart. In silence, love emits, radiates. We experience ourselves in the things we love more. That is why, when we lose the things we love, we feel hurt; we feel unhappy.

Suppose you love your piano very much and you hear that something has happened to your piano, something gets cut-off in you. Or, if something happens to your car and your dog, you feel a loss. So, you are not just living in your body, but also in that of the objects or people you love. But if you can expand this existence even more to cover the entirety, you will know that there is no loss and you are total.

You are a blue pearl. Blue is beautiful; blue is something that is big, vast and infinite. All that is immense and infinite in creation and that which has depth expresses itself in blue.

The sky is blue, the ocean is blue. You are a blue pearl, in the sense that you can’t be measured. You are so deep in your being. Though you are in your body, nobody can measure your being. The being in you is not just the blue infinity; it’s a shining radiant infinity that is deep and immense. Blue pearl means that which is shining, that which is radiant, that which is infinite; yet. It seems to be so finite.

When we start listening to our heart, the we know that all is one; and one god is in all. See, in our body we have so many cells and each cell has got its own life. Many cells are being born every day, many cells are dying but they do not know you. You know if something is wrong with one particular cell; you can feel it. Similarly, though we are all made up of small units of life, there is one life that covers and governs all other lives.

We are all floating in an ocean of life; a big life. It is not just empty space all around us; it is lively big life. And in the big sea of life there, all shells are floating and each shell has got a little water in it which is not the water separate from the water in the sea.

So, we come out of our shells and experience, “I am not just in the body, but I am expanded all over; everywhere, it’s me there and it’s me here. I see myself in everybody”

That is the essence of life!

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I read this article in "The Times Of India" of 20th April....its from the "The Art of living foundation"

Youth

Some 3-4 days back, we were informed about a student of our college who needs a kidney transplant. The operation costs a whopping amount, hence financial support was necessary. A few students took up the initiative to arrange for the same; even the management and faculty members extended their support. A notice was put up at various places in the college campus, requesting students to support and rise for the cause. Some read it casually, some paid attention and some were even ignorant about it. A support box was placed in the campus. A bunch of students, however, made a mockery out of it and started putting ₹1, ₹2 coins in the support box as if they are giving alms. I don’t know what they thought and why they thought of doing such a travesty. Some students from his (the boy who needs the transplant) class informed us about the act of mockery when they came to our class to inform us about a meeting that they were organizing for the support cause. 

This is really concerning. The youth has become so unemotional and unresponsive. However, nothing can be generalized. There are some people who are really taking the initiative for some social cause and if not taking the initiative, they are at least not backing off or making a farce out of it. But the other side of the coin, the unethical and unconcerned attitude is really concerning. The end up spending money on meaningless things, especially on those things that are considered to be not good and may be harmful. If they save their one day’s expenses and donate it for some noble cause, then it will really be great. At least, it would do something needful.

Today’s world suffers from many problems. Leave the world, in our country there are several causes to fight for. The youth has to rise and take the control for the betterment. And, by rising I don’t mean setting up of some social service groups or something of that sort. I don’t think just doing that  would really work. I don’t say that all of them are good for nothing; some are seriously working for the good. But, what I mean to say is that one need not establish some kind of groups or be a part of such groups to actually help in any cause. You could do your own part. Like it’s better to individually teach a single child on your own level and do something productive to educate the child than to build up a social organization and take up hundreds of students and doing no good to them. I myself have come across such group where some 15- 20 students come daily to study for an hour or so but almost each one of them hardly learn anything at all. They are motivated to come and study there but those students never go to a school; even when there is a provision for a free primary education in our country. So, it’s better if you rise yourself and take up pace for the cause. But still everything depends on the way you think. The youth has to rise and involve themselves for the good of mankind and society. Each individual has to do something for the greater good that would give an eternal satisfaction to their beings. After all, its One Life To Live!

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A QUESTION

All Indians must have heard the childhood story of Mahatma Gandhi: when a school inspector came to his school and took a test of the students by dictating five words and Mahatma Gandhi had wrongly spelled a word. Even after the teacher’s instruction to rectify his mistake by peeping into his neighbor’s copy, he didn't do it.

What followed this story is very much known to everybody. The fact is, this incident has become just a ‘story’ for everybody. Such honesty is considered to be seen only in stories. Almost everybody seem to consider that, such incidents can happen in a story and real incidents present a complete different scenario. Or may be even, occurrence of such incidents is limited only to the lives of great people is another way of thinking. But, a thing to ponder over, when such incidents happened in the lives of great people, they were as ordinary as we are now, but, what they did then, and how they did it, made them great. They never did certain things with an intention to be great and good. They did those because they felt it as the right way of doing things. They responded to certain situations in a special way, not intending to make it special. They responded that way because, it was their spontaneous self. They never "planned" to behave good. They behaved well because they were actually good. That is what distinguished them from others. That is what made the difference.

But…..

This was just a one sided view. All great men were great but, there were and there are some honest people who never made it large. For some, conditions were unfavorable, for some resources (not exactly material resources)were the major hindrance and for some, just being honest did not turn out.

Yeah, it’s true; at least if seen from the perspective of today’s “realistic world”. Yeah, values like honesty, truthfulness, sincerity are outdated in today’s times. Those who speak loudly of such values are considered to be dumb and psychotic. If ever, anybody wants to be honest or do something good, the generation kicks the person hard, they are discouraged to a great extent and sometimes even jeered upon.

Well, everybody knows what happens. Most people would have seen this happen. After all it’s a regular scenario everybody is acquainted, well acquainted, with. But is it really mad to clutch to our values??? If you yourself can’t adhere to the values, why do you disgrace those who respect and have faith on them?! What I want to tell is: I agree that today’s world has become unethical to a certain extent and values are outdated, but what about people who still adhere to such things.

What say?

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Memorable view.

I don’t believe this. I never wanted this to happen. I mean, it was destined to be like this but, I never really thought…. so early!! All of a sudden, you know! It was quite unexpected in my part to believe what I just witnessed! Well, let me describe this in details.

In my class, I always like to sit in the first bench, for the convenience that it offers - one rarely gets disturbed there and it's easy to dexterously avoid small talk during lectures. So, I always used to sit there, even during "adverse"  situations such as class exams or boring lectures. However, a few days before my end semester exams (inter-semester vacations are on as I write this), a bunch of girls would "reserve" the entire first bench, for reasons best known to them. I had to change my seat to the second bench, by the window side. Well, initially it was a little inconvenient, until one day.....

That day, one of our lecturers ended the session early, 10 minutes early. So, we had almost 15 minutes free time (10 minutes+ 5 minutes for the next class to start). Almost everybody moved out of the classroom, but I remained seated and looked casually out of the window. And… what did I see? A lush green paddy field, splendidly beautiful, just amazing. It's beauty left me spellbound, really! I mean, it was simply fantabulous. That 15 minutes passed like a jiffy, completely lost in those greens. From then onward, whenever I had time, I just looked outside and got enthralled. I would contemplate the different colors of the paddy field whenever it rippled with the wind unleashing its different moods, as if it is uttering a hundred words to the breeze and murmuring rhymes onto the zephyr, prancing and dancing with joy sometimes, and sometimes……sometimes, with utter grief, unable to withstand the zephyr’s soothing melody. And, I slowly realized that now I don’t want to leave this seat in the second bench. I have started loving the place by the window, yeah I mean,I really did. I started doing my most favorite activity there, my favorite activity, writing! I carried my notepad to the classroom and whenever I could manage some time, be it 5 minutes or 10 minutes, I would write, inspired by the kaleidoscopic view  that the "outside the window" world portrayed. I wrote numbers of poems and articles and all of them had the trance of the fields. Sometimes, I just glanced outside and enjoyed whatever the fields tried to convey. I liked to do that many a times, just observing them. I was so lost in that reverie that I did not even realize that that vista had formed a certain sort a bond with me. It was November when…..

That day when I looked outside, I just couldn't believe my eyes! I mean, I couldn’t fathom anything. What has happened? Our lecture started and I couldn't properly discern the actual thing. As soon as the lecture ended, I looked outside again and I expected some magic to happen this time. Perhaps, whatever I saw earlier was just a hallucination or just a bad dream or whatever. I just wanted to see something pleasant. I looked outside and I realized, whatever I saw was no hallucination, no bad dream, but the bitter truth. Half of the field was cut and the paddy, so yellow, so pale, lay there. Perhaps, they also never wanted it. The wind blew but they lay still. The half of the field that survived the harvest, were also still and seemed so crestfallen that they too didn't respond to the zephyr. The zephyr tried hard to cheer them up but couldn’t. I couldn't believe how all of a sudden everything changed. Every time I looked, I just hoped that everything was fine, but it was not. That day, seemed like a day of disgrace. The next day, I again looked outside only to see that the whole field was destructed, looted upon. The lush paddy, that stood yesterday, was not there. Everything seemed so empty, so void. The breeze rustled but there was nobody to play with it, nobody to dance to its rhyme. The breeze, too, seemed doleful. The sun that blessed them seemed so harsh now, so dull, so gloomy. And, everything ended. I stopped looking outside and now, I don’t like that seat anymore, but I hope life again blooms there soon. Everything went on like they used to be earlier. Everything, but the paddy field.
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Heading Backwards

That day left me with a big question. Yes, I could perhaps never forget that day. In reality, in everybody’s life, many incidents occur which turn out to be the milestones and compels to think over the matter and this changes the way of thinking, in some cases. And to say it aloud, many such incidents have also materialized in my life. But that day something unexpected happened,…something that changed my thoughts and the way I perceived things. I actually never thought that I would take the thing into account and would actually think over it.

Well, that was a Friday. So, that Friday morning, I went to a nearby temple. I went walking. In my way to the temple, I was deeply immersed in my thoughts and was completely in ‘My World’…..my world of strange imaginations, absurd experimentation, weird thoughts, thoughts out of the world,…blah blah blah…..well nobody understands that. So, when I was in a Minerva of my out of the world thoughts, I was disturbed by something. I looked behind and it was a small girl who was asking for alms. She didn’t seem a beggar (I may be pardoned if I am being offensive), I mean she looked good, neatly dressed. I got irritated by her way of asking for alms. She kept on pleading. I strictly denied and shoo-ed her away by telling that I don’t have any change. “Oh God! These little brats…I tell you! They are so irritating. Why are they like this? Whatever!” I didn’t want to go off-mood. So, I ignored everything and went to the temple.

I prayed, did my puja and sat for sometimes in the temple steps. Sitting in the temple steps after offering prayers is considered to be auspicious. Again I harked myself into my world... continuing from where I left…..before the puja. Everything was so serene around there…so calm….just perfect for my thoughts. And I was enjoying all that was happening….I just didn’t want to come out of it. But I had to. I heard someone crying. Perhaps it was a small kid. As I hovered my eyes around the place, I saw a small boy who was sitting by the road side tree and crying very pitifully….as if he has seen a dreadful dream about some ghostly world or may be some kind of demon or something. I also noticed that every person present over there was looking at the boy who disturbed the tranquility of the area by his loud cries. It then became an issue. I mean, discussions started about the boy…. “Oh! Why is he crying so loud?”, “Why is he sitting by the road?”, “Where’s his mother?”,”How could she be so irresponsible?”, “When is he going to stop the nuisance?”, “Why don’t someone just go and stop him or console him?” …were some of the questions that were asked abruptly and meaninglessly. Some ‘kind-hearted’ persons over there said, “perhaps the kid is hungry”, “He is a cute kid. Oh why is he crying?”

The child was still crying. It has been two-three minutes now. The discussion has almost stopped. Perhaps the people over there had attuned themselves to the ‘noise’. Everybody now seemed indifferent. I was still looking at the boy and I don’t know what I was thinking. I was just looking at the boy. A sudden feat urged me to go and console the boy and ask him about his parents and all. But I didn’t. I was perhaps too lazy to care for my urge. I then thought, “if ever I go there and ask him, will he be able to answer me. C’mon he is so small. He is perhaps only two or three”. So, I stopped myself. Then, I saw somebody who was holding the boy in lap. Oh, she is the same girl who was asking me for alms. Why is she near that boy? She was feeding the boy with something that she had perhaps fetched from the nearby food stall. My urge now forced me to go there and ask the girl about the boy. I mean how does she know the boy? Is she related to him? So, finally I went to the girl and asked her,“Who is he?”

She replied, seeming very busy, “My brother”.

“What are both of you doing here?” “Where’s your mother?”

I asked her some more questions and from her answers what I deciphered: They used to live in a nearby village with their family; a joint family with parents, uncle-aunt and two cousins. All was well until the day when they had a major fight in their family; the kids don’t know why. After few days, their parents died because of a fire fury in their village with many other people. As they didn’t want to breed on somebody else's mercy, they both came here and now the girl is trying to earn a livelihood for herself and her brother.

I couldn’t understand what to do, how to reply. I took a glance at my watch and realized that I was getting late. So, abruptly I gave her the ‘Prasad’ and a ten rupee note and hurried away from there. Was I supposed to do that? I couldn’t understand what was I supposed to do then. I was void at that moment, perhaps. I mean, what I did? Was the ten rupee note enough? I mean no, not the money. Even if I would have given them a hundred rupee note or something, was it still enough. Was that the only thing I could have done? Something….something was needed on my side, something that should have been done to ‘actually rehabilitate’ them. But what is that something? Does there exist a proper answer to this question? Is there nothing that could have been done? If anybody adopts them….c’mon who would have done that? The people in the temple seemed such apathetic jerks. I myself was one of them. However, I would request anybody, reading this, to answer ourselves one question –“where are we actually heading?” This is 21st century and in this ultra fast era of super technologies, we are technologically moving forward, at a very fast pace. But at the same time, coming to our very own source of existence (source of we being ‘HUMANS’), are we actually heading forward or else…… Just think We don’t just care about anybody in the earth other than ourselves… oh not also our own selves…. We don’t care about our own selves, forget others. Great!!! We are turning into heartless demons or should I say ‘very intelligent HUMANOIDS’. You don’t want to be one….Right? 

JUST GIVE IT A THOUGHT.

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‘I Am A Servant’

“I believe that God has planted in every heart the desire to live in freedom… We need to use power to help people-for we are given power not to advance our own purposes, nor to make a great show in the world, nor a name. There is but one just use of power and it is to serve people.”

-George W Bush

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